Dangers of Withering Under Pressure
When you physically, mentally, or emotionally break down when facing difficult periods, you have a lot to lose. It shows that you are weak in some areas and shows that you have not been mentally prepared for the days of adversity. Here are some of the dangers of bowing down to the pressures of life.
According to the National Network of Depression Centres, one in five Americans will be affected by depression in their lifetimes. This psychological problem, alongside anxiety, is one of the leading mental issues in the world today. This fact isn’t too shocking because the modern world is full of potentially mentally damaging situations. When you are not sturdy enough to weather your stormy days, you will plunge into depression.
Note that depression isn’t the same as the regular brief moments of sadness we experience due to our daily unpleasant occurrence. What makes it depression is the intensity and the period. A person suffering from depression will experience intense feelings of sadness that can last for a significant part of the day. It can even last for days or weeks.
One of the signs of depression is social withdrawal. This is when you prefer to stay indoors and sleep in your bed than go out with friends and family. There is nothing wrong with having occasional times when you just want to be alone. However, it is a problem if it is something you do a lot. Talk to a therapist as soon as possible if you often experience negative emotions before it leads to suicidal ideations.
Lack of Self-Confidence
If you don’t believe in yourself, no one will take that gamble on you. It’s only in sporadic cases people hand responsibilities to people who don’t believe they have what it takes to succeed in a role. One reason such people are given responsibilities is that no other person can be trusted to take the role. When you allow your challenges to overwhelm you, your confidence will be shattered.
You will get used to giving excuses for your failures. In fact, in most cases, you would have said it beforehand that you’ll not succeed in the task. So, when you fail, you will remind your critics that you have already predicted your failure before then. It’s alright to have a realistic evaluation of your abilities. Nonetheless, the truth is that there are cases you will never know what you can do until you make an attempt.
So, the best test of your ability to solve a problem is to try. Some people have been lucky enough to stumble on the solution to a problem because they attempted. Such people made their own luck. Luck only favors the bold. Approach a situation like someone who has nothing to lose. If you fail, you would have learned how not to do it.
Loss of Trust
If you want people to trust you, you need to start facing your challenges and seek ways to overcome them. If you have a history of petering out when the going gets tough, no one will trust you. This can be problematic and limiting when you have ambitions to attain leadership positions. One of the attributes of great leaders is their ability to solve problems.
No one will remember the leader who went into hiding when things weren’t going smoothly. Suppose you want to become that person others can trust during their stormy days. In that case, you must be known for your ability to stay healthy when you were facing challenging situations. You can never give what you don’t have. It is when you have been able to solve your own problems that you can help others.
Fear is part and parcel of our lives as human beings. It is the reason we build strong walls and fences around our homes and communities. It is also the reason we go for medical check-ups. We don’t want anything that will compromise our security or damage our health. However, it’s a problem when you are overwhelmed by your fears such that they prevent you from attempting to make the best out of your life.
The days of adversity trains you to face your fears and learn to overcome them. However, when you run away from challenges, you will become a slave to fear. You will be afraid of failing because you don’t want people to criticize you. You don’t want others to mock you. So, you end up always giving excuses for your fears.
You might call it being realistic. However, that is far from the truth. If you don’t know how to do something, learn about it from people who can put you through. The modern world offers countless materials that can help you learn how to do anything. So, the lack of information is no longer a tenable excuse. Don’t live your life in fear. Face your challenges and damn the consequences.
You’ll live the rest of your life in shame and guilt when you remember how you backed down when you should have shown more courage. It gets worse when you see others who had more challenges succeed where you had failed. You don’t want to tell your children that you had failed earlier in life because you were too afraid to take a bold step.
They might not say anything out of respect for you, but they know that you were only giving flimsy excuses. You cannot afford to live the rest of your life in the shadows because you often break down when facing challenging situations. Now is the time to build mental strength by making the best of what life throws at you.
Stop complaining about the things you cannot change and start working on the things you can improve. When life hits you, stand up and walk again. You will wish you did so later in your life. You don’t have to remember your youthful days with shame and regrets when you grow older.
When you keep breaking down whenever you face unpleasant situations, you might end up taking your life someday. It all begins by seeing yourself as a person that doesn’t deserve to be loved and treated with value. Lack of resilience will make you prone to judgment errors because you will often blame others or circumstances for your predicaments.
You’ll believe that life has been fairer to others than to you. You will blame your parents for your poverty and your gene for your lack of dexterity and creativity. Indeed, your parents and other people in your life might have contributed to your lack of opportunities. For example, they might not have sponsored your education. Nonetheless, it is not an excuse.
The world is full of people who educated themselves due to their determination and refusal to give excuses for failing in life. So, at the end of the day, you are responsible for whatever you make of your life. So, start taking more responsibilities today. Failure to do so can lead to having thoughts of taking your life at different points.
How To Build A Resilient Spirit
Now that you have a good grasp of the benefits and disadvantages of standing up during tough times, it is time to discuss how you can build a resilient spirit. The tips below will help you in this regard.
See Every Challenge As An Opportunity
The difference between people who stand firm when facing challenges and those who break down is their perception. The person withering away due to the situation feels there is no way out again. He or she feels things can never get better. Such people are fixated on what they have lost and found it difficult to imagine starting all over again after the effort they have put in initially.
However, resilient people look on the bright side. They see the experience as a learning curve and are willing to start all over again. They aren’t happy about the situation. Nonetheless, they know that they will be better off by forging ahead. They know that they will not gain anything by wailing and complaining. They understand that complaining and sulking will only make things worse. So, they choose to see the unpleasant experience as an opportunity to be better prepared for future incidents.
Failure doesn’t mean you aren’t good enough. Instead, it shows that you might not have been prepared enough or the situation is just out of your control. So, if you want to build a resilient spirit, you have to see setbacks as opportunities to grow and learn. You need to start seeing adversity as a trainer that has come to make you mentally more robust and better prepared for the future.
Always Learn From Your Past
“Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning.” Albert Einstein
Whoever doesn’t learn from the past is not smart. Such a person is wasting valuable experiences that are supposed to make him or her better. It might sound strange that some people don’t learn from their mistakes. One of the reasons some people make the same mistakes is that they feel their past errors were just coincidental.
So, they feel things will be different if they stick to their guns. Indeed, there is a place for sticking to your guns when you believe in the process. However, you should have a better and advanced version of the original approach that failed. The fact that a process didn’t work out doesn’t mean you need a complete overhauling. You might only need to tweak your approach a little to increase your chances of getting the right result.
Just like the advice of Einstein, you cannot afford to stop growing and learning. A crucial part of your learning process is your past. Your past contains both the sweet and bitter experiences that have shown you better ways of doing things. You should leverage them to build a resilient spirit when facing challenging moments.
Reduce Your Expectations
One of the reasons people get disappointed in life is that they have heightened expectations. There’s nothing wrong with having desires you hope will be met. You can expect to have a fantastic marital relationship. In the same way, you can crave your dream job. You need such desires so that you can pursue them as much as possible. However, you shouldn’t see these goals as do or die affairs.
In other words, if your relationship or even marriage doesn’t work out as planned, remember JK Rowling. She is an excellent example of
How a failed marriage shouldn’t be the end of your life. Indeed, we cannot deny that it is a situation that can be emotionally devastating. In an ideal case, people marry because they are in love and hope to spend the rest of their lives in each other’s loving arms.
So, when things go awry, it can be psychologically tasking. Nonetheless, you have to move on. Believe the best about your family, spouse, job, and every other aspect of your life. However, you shouldn’t expect that nothing can go wrong. No one wants something bad to happen. However, you should have it somewhere in your mind that things might not go as planned. When you have this moderate expectation, you will find it easier to recover if things go wrong.
Despite the volatile and unpredictable nature of life, we cannot do without hope. We need optimism to go through life. Optimism is a positive expectation regarding certain things. You need to be positive during the days when things are rosy and pleasant. You
shouldn’t be fearful that something terrible will happen that will turn your world upside down even though that possibility cannot be ruled out.
However, you shouldn’t be making predictions of doom about any aspect of your life. This practice is tantamount to making a self-fulfilling prophecy. It is too negative, and you shouldn’t engage in such limiting behavior. Moreover, the best time you need to be optimistic is after a significant setback. You need to convince yourself that you can still live a happy and fulfilled life despite the unfortunate occurrence.
People take their lives when they get to that point of hopelessness, where they feel that their lives aren’t worth living anymore. You should guide against that. Don’t just think optimistically; you should also write and speak optimism. Say it loud to yourself after a setback that you are coming back better and stronger.
Take Life One Step At A Time
You cannot afford to live your life based on the pace of the modern world. If you do so, you’ll be overwhelmed with stress and pressure. You should take things slowly. When you are in a hurry to succeed,
you’ll struggle to recover when you face turbulent times. You’ll feel that you are wasting valuable time, and that will lead to frustration.
The most important thing is that you shouldn’t be stagnant. As long as you are making progress, regardless of how little it seems, you should be satisfied with your life. Of course, if you find ways to accelerate your progress, you should take advantage of them. However, you should avoid desperation to get to the top because it can leave you with scars that will never heal.
Don’t be too competitive. Avoid unnecessary comparisons with others. Focus on yourself and the progress you are making. The only reason you shouldn’t be happy with yourself is when you are not making progress personally. Don’t measure your success by what others have achieved. You must take things slowly, especially after a setback. Pick up yourself, walk, and then run again.
There are times you need to be rigid. You need to stick to your guns sometimes because many people feel you cannot succeed unless you dance to their tune and use their approach. However, the truth is that there is no formula for success in life. People use different techniques to achieve a level of success in different endeavors in life. So, you should have a strategy and believe it will work.
It’s always better to do something the way you want it and fail rather than follow a person’s recommendation and fail. The latter hurts more. So, don’t allow people to throw you around because they feel their plans are better than yours. Nonetheless, you should be open to advise. You should be able to recognize good counsel and follow it.
Find people who are more experienced with the pressures of life and have succeeded in that endeavor. Seek their advice and compare it with your plan before drawing an inference. When you have people that can give you the tips you need to improve, it becomes easier to recover from a setback and forge ahead.